nathanr|ca

Alright.. so my contract with Virgin Mobile is expiring at the end of the month & it's time for me to renew it. They've called & they're offering to throw in call display & voicemail for free & that's nice (even though I don't really need voicemail).

But anyway..

I have the LG Rumor currently. I have no problems with it but if I'm going to be offered another phone (most of them are free or cost a little more), then fine, I'll take it.

So, I initially ordered the LG Bliss. Looks a bit like a PDA. That's not entirely a bad thing, is it? Didn't think so. Touchscreens are cool.

What I failed to realize though is that this phone does not have a slide-out keyboard. The Bliss is like the Xenon but without the keyboard. Hmm. Don't want that, then. Can you imagine texting with that thing? "Yeah, I'll finish texting you sometime this century." How about no? I text (and type) more than I talk.

I changed my mind (while the order was still open) & they sent me that phone anyway. *facepalm* Tried it anyway & didn't like it…

..and of course it figures that since the call centre sent me the phone, I can't take it back to a retail kiosk. I have to call Virgin themselves, ask for a shipping envelope (or box), send it back, wait until they receive it, then they send the new phone out, etc & that's a pain in the butt.

The second thing that bugs me is that I can't even order the phone I want (the Xenon) because my provider doesn't sell it. They seem to be a bit backward when it comes to new phones. Blah. They'll probably have it in stock next year.

I guess I'm stuck with the Rumor 2, which isn't too bad. It was a tiny upgrade. I just wish they would've sent me the right phone from the start. That's not too much to ask, is it?

DISCLAIMER: Yes, my inner therapist won't shut up. Best to just let me rant & get it over with.

This is something that's been on my mind a lot & I thought I'd just get it off my chest. You don't have to know the situation (although there are at least two three situations I can think of).

Is it ever acceptable to tell parents that you know better than they do? Yes. Always – as long as you can do it in a constructive way.

Is it ever acceptable to tell your parents that you know better than they do? Same answer. It depends if they'd listen. Sure, you might have to fight with them to get them to see things your way or just try to work it out..

Yes, this post is about overprotective parents. I know the type very well. When will parents get it through their heads that they're not doing their kids any favours by monitoring their movements 24/7/365, controlling their actions, limiting their freedom, etc? They're depriving their children of a normal childhood. They clearly have no idea what's going on in their children's lives or how they're making their children feel by doing this. It's wrong to make a child feel as though they can't be trusted.

The best way to parent a child is to teach them how to think for themselves. Sit down with them & teach them about life. Talk to them. Help them. That's what parents are supposed to do.

My mother's cat had to be put down last month. He had taken about four strokes, he was dehydrated, the vet said possibly diabetes or liver damage & he was losing a lot of weight, practically skin and bones during his last days. He also got sick a lot, as older cats tend to do.

She had the cat for 22 years so he lived beyond the average lifespan of an indoor cat. (she got him when he was 2 & he would have been 25 on the third of this month).

Here are some photos of him doing what he does best (lounging, of course):

I wrote a post about Valentine's Day several years ago, so I thought I'd delete it and rewrite it.

My friend Terry wrote about why she hates Valentine's Day.

I'm not too fond of it either. I think it should be officially renamed "Singles Awareness Day".

Why do I think this?

Well firstly, like most "holidays", it seems to be about spending money, giving gifts and oh, let's not forget the commercialism. It's way too commercial. Why spend money if you don't need to? Why feel pressured to do something on that day? The best thing you can do today is just be with someone you care about. You don't really need to spend money at all. (Besides, if I'm in the gift-giving mood – which is fairly often – I try to go with something home-made or I just try to do something nice for someone.).

You don't need to set a specific day aside to express your appreciation for your significant other when you can do this any day of the week. If you can't make every day special, there's seriously something wrong with you. Bit pointless, don't you think? Of course it is.

Moving on..

It seems to be specifically targeted at couples, while single people either ignore it (and try to pretend it doesn't exist) or they feel miserable (because they're single & don't have anyone to celebrate the day with). Are single people supposed to feel miserable? Why should they? (Sure, nobody seems to notice I exist but should I feel miserable about it? No. Just for once though, I wish someone did. Do looks really matter that much? There's nothing wrong with the way I look; I just don't match society's "ideal" of what a guy should look like. Isn't that a bit shallow? I'd really rather not but I digress..)

However, it's also a day to appreciate your friends (I don't care if there's a Friendship Day) so with that said, this is for my friends:

"Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think." (Christopher Robin to Pooh)
- A.A. Milne

"A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are."
- Unknown

"Truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget."
- Unknown

I'll say it again: Thank you…and now my rambling comes to an end.

I've been reading some very old posts from my ex-girlfriend's blog.

This is something she once said to someone (she'll remember who it is when I tell her) but the advice could have been applied to myself as well as that person:

"The meat isn't getting any tender, so maybe you should stop pounding".

That's an important life lesson: to know exactly when to walk away – knowing you've said everything you can say but the person just doesn't understand where you're coming from & maybe it's time to walk away. There's a difference between making a point and beating someone over the head with it.

I've been on both sides of that fence. It's not fun. I've been the person who didn't know how to walk away as well as the person others didn't know how to walk away from.

That's a lesson I should have learned ages ago. It's never too late to learn it.

"In order to help others, you have to help yourself first."

I need to take my own advice, especially now.

I've been denying that a problem exists (with my family). I'm not going to get into specifics, though. I've mentioned it once already if you know where to look.

Since I can't do anything about it, I have no choice but to take a step back, for the sake of my sanity. It's the hardest thing I've ever had to do but I know it has to be done. It's necessary.

“Any society begins by realizing that together, by helping each other, you can survive better than if you fight each other and compete with each other. We have the tendency to lose it when we forget that, as a group, we are stronger than we are as individuals.”

– George Lucas

Last week, I messaged an ex-girlfriend on Facebook (no names) & apologized for my part in our mutually destructive relationship, which happened several years ago.

I came to the realization that I drove her to do a lot of the things she did (even though they were they weren't necessarily the right actions to take).

I was prepared for the worst – that she wouldn't read the message. Somehow, I didn't expect her to really read it (the relationship ended that badly) Instead, she surprised me – she not only replied but agreed that both of us were to blame.

In a way, I'm proud of her for that. I'm glad she listened. She could easily have told me to piss off, right? I have a tremendous amount of respect for her & I'm very grateful.

We seem to understand each other a lot better now. This needed to happen & I'm glad it did. I hope we can become better friends.

This may be one of my flaws (or a strength, or perhaps both): I just can't let things go. I want to be able to fix everything (and everyone) – and sometimes I make things better & sometimes I make things worse. I haven't been able to truly let go of this for years.

It really hurt me that I've hurt her & I've wanted to make amends for some time – properly. I just needed to realize exactly why I did what I did. After all, an apology doesn't really have the same effect if you can't explain the reason behind your actions, right? I didn't think so either.

I guess I'm still feeling hurt from losing that friend – and yes, I know I've gained far more than I've lost. She was never really a friend, right? That doesn't help nearly as much as it should. This song sums it up… (I'm really starting to like Paramore. I know who to blame for that. Yes, I'm looking at you, Kyra.)

I'm thinking my former friend attracts jerks because she behaves like a jerk herself. She's uncaring, insensitive and doesn't take the time to really listen when she should. I'm not saying she's a jerk, though. That's how I feel. I can't judge people that way. I know I'm better than that.

I know that somewhere beneath the surface, she's a good person. It saddens me that I didn't get to know that person & I only got to know the jerk.

Like I just said on Facebook: I really want to believe that somewhere deep down, everyone is good. "Condemn the action & not the person", right? Sometimes we can't see beneath the surface because the mask they wear is too powerful.

It may be true that I've lost a friend (now it begs the question of exactly how much of a friend she was but anyway) but a few days later, I gained a kindred spirit – someone who understands me.

Last night, a friend of mine IM'd me & opened up to me. He told me about his own problems & what he's going through (and it just so happens to be the same issues I'm facing right now). We can completely relate to one another.

So that's making the best out of a bad situation. I'd say I'm pretty damned lucky.